There have been millions of songs recorded and sold since old Edison patented his gramophone. But almost none have been to my liking.The rap genre, for instance, contains 0% interest for me. It's comedy that gets me; and the only two people/groups that I actively seek out their songs are Weird Al Yankovic and political parodiers The Capitol Steps. So in fact, the entire list of songs that I have heard and liked can be written down in a single blog post. Impossible, do you say? Au contraire!
And please note that songs that were composed as written poems instead of being set to music do not belong to this list. Neither do songs created specifically for movie or TV soundtracks, nor songs of a religious bent. A final omission are non-English songs, which cuts out a lot of Hebrew songs; the highest placed song to get slashed this way is Afrinkaaner CapeTown's "Waka Waka" at the former #3 spot.

190. Livin' in the Fridge – Weird Al Yankovic (henceforth referred to as WAY)
189. Land of Confusion – Genesis
188. We Didn't Start the Fire – Billy Joel
187. The Fools on the Hill – The Capitol Steps (henceforth referred to as TCS)
186. Welcome to the Jungle – Guns N' Roses
185. Calm Eagle – CAKE
184. All the Same – Sick Puppies
183. You Can't Fly with Giant Thighs – TCS
182. Another One Rides the Bus – WAY
181. I Wrecked My Heart With Spam and Crisco – TCS
180. Sweet Home Alabama – Lynyrd Skynyrd
179. Speaker of the House – TCS
178. If You Knew Souter Like I Knew Souter – TCS
177. Polonium 209 – TCS
176. We Are – Ana Johnsson
175. Little Doc Koop – TCS
174. Dumbstruck – TCS
173. Jurassic Park – WAY
172. The Green, Green Grass of Nome – TCS

171. What if God Smoked Cannabis – Bob Rivers
170. Papa's Got a Brand New Baghdad - TCS
169. Diverse City – tobyMac
168. Sheik to Sheik – TCS
167. Camel Lot – TCS
166. I Lost on Jeopardy – WAY
165. Lookin' for Scuds in All the Wrong Places – TCS
164. Millie the Poocher – TCS
163. Ugly Girl – Kelly Clarkson
162. Bibbity Bobbity Spew – TCS
161. Revolution – The Beatles
160. Barney's on Fire – Tony Mason
159. Yo Ho (A Pirate's Life for Me) – Jonas Brothers (originally X Atencio)
158. Spider Hole - TCS
157. Who Says You Can't Go Home – Bon Jovi
156. Neighborhood Bully – Bob Dylan
155. I Think I'm a Clone Now – WAY
154. Goodbye – Plankeye
153. Close But No Cigar – WAY

152. Huckabee – TCS
151. Put Ten Grand in the Hand – TCS
150. OhMyGodImOnFire – Logan Whitehurst
149. Resume Mucho - TCS
148. Fun, Fun, Fun, 'Til Teddy Puts His T-Shirt Away – TCS
147. (Get Your Kicks On) Route 66 – Chuck Berry (originally Bobby Troup)
146. Ollie Would – TCS
145. Meese's Pieces – TCS
144. Gump – WAY
143. Embattled Him of the Republicans – TCS
142. Heard it on the Nightline – TCS
141. Leader of the PAC – TCS
140. A Complicated Song – WAY
139. Sushi and the M.C.A. – TCS
138. Nature's Law – Embrace
137. 76 Bad Loans – TCS
136. Don't Know Much About Strategy – TCS
135. Ducoccus – TCS
134. White & Nerdy – WAY

133. Heavy Traffic – TCS
132. Kosovo – TCS
131. I'll Sue Ya – WAY
130. Kung Fu Fighting – Carl Douglas
129. Yappety Yap – TCS
128. Cat's in the Cradle – Harry Chapin
127. Day Care – TCS
126. Weasel Stomping Day - WAY
125. When I'm 84 – TCS
124. God Bless the USA – Lee Greenwood
123. Read My Flips – TCS
122. Blame it on the Boss at NASA – TCS
121. The Curly Shuffle – Jump 'N The Saddle Band
120. Sound of Moose-Sick – TCS
119. You're So Vain – Carly Simon
118. This Fish is Made for Walkin' – TCS
117. Condoleezza – TCS
116. Good Riddance (Time of Your Life) – Green Day
115. Hillary Will Survive – TCS

114. Help Me Make it Through the Flight – TCS
113. Heaven Forbid – The Fray
112. Won't You Go Home, Bill Bradley? – TCS
111. Downside Story – TCS
110. Freak Out – Avril Lavigne
109. Who'll Put a Bomb on Saddam Saddam Saddam? – TCS
108. Suspension – Mae
107. Roll Out the Daryl – TCS
106. We Will Rock You – Queen
105. You Don't Bring Me Floriculturally Diverse Polyfragrant Soilistically Challenged Multipetaled Victims of Pesticidal Food Chain Chauvinism – TCS
104. You're the Best – Joe Esposito
103. Ode to a Superhero – WAY
102. Another One Bites the Dust – Queen
101. You're So Vague – TCS
100. Anytime You Need a Friend – The Beu Sisters
99. Here Comes Another Bubble – The Richter Scales
98. Proud Barry – TCS
97. Cause I'm a Blonde – Julie Brown
96. Like a Suburban Drone – TCS

95. Don't Download This Song – WAY
94. Georgie's Revenge – TCS
93. The Elements Song – Tom Lehrer
92. I Can't Say Yo – TCS
91. We Only Have McCain – TCS
90. Jerry Springer – WAY
89. Help Rwanda – TCS
88. Rockin' Robin – Bobby Day
87. Bob – WAY
86. Korea – TCS
85. Eat it – WAY
84. Blow Me Away – Breaking Benjamin
83. 'Atsa Lawyer – TCS
82. Proud Mary – Creedence Clearwater Revival
81. Like a Surgeon – WAY
80. Tie a Yellow Ribbon 'Round My Oldsmobile – TCS
79. The Hardest Rhyme – TCS
78. Fat – WAY
77. I'll Be There for You – The Rembrandts

76. United Through it All - Michael Allen, Randall Bayne, and Steve Mauldin
75. Move Along – The All-American Rejects
74. Cameroon – TCS
73. K-K-Kuwaitis – TCS
72. The Restroom Door Said Gentlemen – Bob Rivers
71. eBay – WAY
70. Livin' la Vida Loca – Ricky Martin
69. Bad Day – Daniel Powter
68. Virus Alert – WAY
67. Talk 'bout Saddam – TCS
66. Walk Away – Kelly Clarkson
65. Jeremullah Was a Bullfrog – TCS
64. Moving On – Good Charlotte
63. Smells Like Nirvana – WAY
62. NATO – TCS
61. How Do You Solve a Problem Like Korea? – TCS
60. Yoda – WAY
59. Summer of '69 – Bryan Adams
58. It's My Life – Bon Jovi

57. Iraq is Robbin' – TCS
56. Happy Birthday – WAY
55. Life is a Highway – Rascal Flatts (originally Tom Cochrane)
54. Livin' Libido Loco – TCS
53. Green Green Grass at Home – TCS
52. Rock and Roll Music – The Beatles (originally Chuck Berry)
51. Won't You Stay Home, Israelis? – TCS
50. Friends o' Mine – Bowling For Soup
49. 100 Years – Five for Fighting
48. Slipped Disco – TCS
47. Wake Me Up When September Ends – Green Day
46. We Are Family – Jump5 (originally Sister Sledge)
45. Don't Stop Me Now – Queen
44. Three Eggs and Ham – TCS
43. Let's Go Mets Go – Shelly Palmer and Tom Bernfeld
42. Super Zealous Radicals – TCS
41. Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh – Allan Sherman
40. 401(k) – TCS
39. The Saga Begins – WAY

38. SuperCaliforniaRecallFreakShowWasAtrocious – TCS
37. Invincible – Pat Benatar
36. Take Me Out to the Ballgame – Jack Norworth
35. We Are the Champions – Queen
34. Kleptomaniac – TCS
33. Slipped Away – Avril Lavigne
32. Y2K – TCS
31. Secret Agent Man – The Ventures (originally Johnny Rivers)
30. Breakaway – Kelly Clarkson
29. Will Not Pay For Numa – Mr. Safety
28. Bump in the Night – Allstars
27. You're Pitiful – WAY
26. Just Like Ron – TCS
25. Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue (The Angry American) – Toby Keith
24. He's Back (The Man Behind the Mask) – Alice Cooper
23. High School Never Ends – Bowling for Soup
22. Too Cool for School – Fountains of Wayne
21. We Arm the World - TCS
20. Your Horoscope for Today – WAY

19. The Irish Ballad – Tom Lehrer
18. God Bless My SUV – TCS
17. Particle Man – They Might Be Giants
16. Canadian Idiot – WAY
15. 1985 – Bowling for Soup
14. Goodbye, Uday, Qusay – TCS
13. The Night Santa Went Crazy – WAY
12. Better Days – Goo Goo Dolls
11. Dare to Be Stupid – WAY
10. Holding Out for a Hero – Bonnie Tyler
9. Sixteen Games – TCS
8. The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny – Lemon Demon
7. The Woes – TCS
6. Amish Paradise – WAY
5. Grow Up – Simple Plan
4. You Don't Love Me Anymore – WAY
3. American Pie – Don McLean
2. The Llama Song – Burton Earny
1. Eye of the Tiger – Survivor


TODAY'S BOOK: "On Language", by William Safire ((c) 1980)

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