Friday, January 08, 2010


339th post

Ah,, thou hast proven the truth of Sturgeon's Law many times over. And yet, out of the foul muck and mire, the Mary Sues and the Canon Rapes, some good things doth arise...

25. Scrat's Haiku (Ice Age, K)
Yes, it's a haiku. But it's a very good haiku, capturing Scrat's essence perfectly in 17 syllables.
24. Lantern Boo (JLU & Animaniacs crossover, K)
A "Chicken Boo" segment set it the Watchtower. Hilarity ensues. How I wish this were real.
23. Omicron Opera (DC animated, T)
A counterintuitive setup: two morally challenged extraterrestrials, Blackfire from Teen Titans and Lobo from Superman, meet in a bar. Better than it sounds.
22. Half of Your Adult Life (Bolt, K+)
One-shot that posits what would happen if the movie's show-within-a-show actors visited a convention. Somewhat fluffy, very well-executed.
21. Will the Real Robin Please Stand Up? (Young Justice, K)
Great good fun with the YJers attempting to uncover Robin's identity, with unpredictably hilarious results.
20. Humor Me & Laugh It Up (Harry Potter & Batman crossovers, K/K+)
Q: If the HPU and DCU coexisted, would the Weasley twins try to prank the Joker? A: Totally. This could just as well be considered a two-chapter story split in half.
19. If the Hat Fits (Discworld, T)
Written by A.A. Pessimal, and get used to that name, because you're going to see it a lot more on this list.
18. Cultural Significance (JLI, K)
For some reason, seems to breed authors who write extremely good, extremely funny, completely IC Justice League International fics. Case in point: this effort from LM, who parlays the heroes eating at a Chinese restaurant into something short yet spectacular.
17. Highway Code (Harry Potter, K)
shewhoguards tells the untold story of just how Ron Weasley got his driver's license. Nobody is OOC, which made me fall in love with this fic immediately, but beyond that, I have to say that Rowling herself could have done no better.
Speaking of shewhoguards...
16. Night of the Anas (Harry Potter, T)
Another behind-the-scenes vignette, crowbarred out of a simple throwaway line in Book 7. No need to worry about OOCness, as the main characters are OCs, and hilarious in their own right to boot.
15. Even Superheroes Need Fashion Consultants (Blue Beetle III, K+)
In the best Jaime Reyes-centered fic I've seen on the site so far, our hero and his scarab prepare for a date with Traci 13. So IC it hurts.
14. The New Guild (Discworld, K+)
A.A. Pessimal takes the euphemestically-named Guild of Seamstresses and turns the concept inside out.
13. A Night on the Town (comic book Teen Titans (ex-YJ members), K)
A visit to Gotham City goes typically awry. Technically under the TT banner, Tim, Kon, Bart and Cassie's characters nevertheless evoke the charm, direction and fast-paced funny Young Justice was known for. Written by the fantastically prolific Mara Greengrass, usually a drabbler, but this one clocks in at well over 4,000 words.
12. Generic Exaggeration (TV Teen Titans, T)
Nothing but an effective series of jabs at the worst cliches prevalent in fanfiction, Amethyst Turtle's parody is still going strong at over 60 chapters.
11. Road Rage (JLI, K)
The other LM story on this list, this one takes all the good qualities found in "Cultural Significance", then cubes them.
10. How Not To Write Fanfiction: A Non Guide (general (but Artemis Fowl-centered), T)
As opposed to "Generic Exaggeration", The One Called Demetra's fic is not a fic at all, but rather lists and pointers on how, indeed, not to write fanfiction. The snark level is over 9,000!
9. All of blubeetle3's Untold Tales of the JLI (JLI, K+)
Simple fact: if DC Comics ever decides to revitalize the JLI series, this is the writer they should turn to. I kid you not.
8. The Mary Sue Test (general, T)
Writing a fic with an OC? Then Elihu's two-chapter guide is absolutely required to tell if you're straying too far into Mary Sue territory. No more, no less.
7. Fishing in the Streams of Time (Discworld, K+)
A.A. Pessimal amazes and amuses yet again, linking the Discworld to the Loch Ness Monster, and throwing in spot-on historical references just for kicks.
6. The Last Temptation of Alfred (Batman, K+)
Alfred Pennyworth is awesome, and all fics starring him are required to be equally awesome. This one, to say the very least, succeeds.
5. The importance of index cards (Discworld, K)
Take two background characters (one from the very first Discworld book), mix in an uncanny amount of matched-up plotting, and what do you get? Another A.A. Pessimal triumph, that's what.
4. The Adventures of Sherlock Brain & The Brain VS the Claw Machine (Pinky and the Brain, K)
Born about a decade too late, The Illustrious Crackpot should have encountered unparalleled success as head writer (or at least associate head writer) of PatB. These two fics perfectly display what the show would have been like in a fanfic format: they are witty, funny, unpredictable, and do not tell the same story twice.
3. 100 Things Crowley Would Do Before the World Ended ("Good Omens", T)
shewhoguards achieves something none of the four other authors with at least three fics on my Favorites list manage to do: all of them are in my Top 25. Clocks in at an astounding 26,628 words in a single chapter (the next-highest on the list, "If The Hat Fits", has a measly 9,909), and worth every single *blessed* one. Since Pratchett & Gaiman's sequel book fell through, this one will have to make up for it--and I can't tell the difference.
2. How André Got His Badge Back (Discworld, K+)
A.A. Pessimal's debut fic, and wow, was it a sizzler. All the hallmarks of his later works are already in full bloom--the wickedly funny lines, the unexpected yet completely sensible canon cross-stitching, the works.
1. Family & Friends (Animaniacs (mainly), T)
I've gone over this before, but it bears repeating: "Family" (and its companion piece, "Friends") are the ABSOLUTE BEST FANFICTIONS EVER WRITTEN. Full stop.

TODAY'S BOOK: "Gregor the Overlander", by Suzanne Collins ((c) 2003)


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