All right.
That's it.
It's happened.
I've finally cracked.
The strain of carrying around all of my passwords to various Internet portals has finally gotten to me. MLB.com, Mets.com, RogerEbert.com, Blogspot, TitansGo.net, and all the rest--it's no good. I've gotta tell the rest of the world!
So I'll start off with my very first password, to both MLB.com and Mets.com:
**********.
Huh?
Oh, never mind. Here, check out my password that enables me to work on this blog:
******.
Waaait a minute!
******! ******! ******!
Say...
************!
That was my IMDb account password! So I get to type but no-one else gets to read it!
Ha ha!
This is brilliant!
****** ************ ********** ****...

TODAY'S BOOK: "The Zoo Gang", by Paul Gallico ((c) 1971)

Labels: password

Run into a church, start ringing the bells and shout out "Ancillary! Ancillary!" If this doesn't work, try a large cup of scotch and lemonade.
Proud member of the Fudge McGurk Fan Club.
With two mighty swings of his Big Hammer, Oliver Platt catapulted himself to my Top 10 list of Funniest Moments Ever Put on Screen.
Gosh, I love the Edit button. I've been altering my blog slightly--a touch here, a touch there, affixing labels, rearranging the spelling, et cetera--over the past few weeks. Why, for all you know, NONE of my pasts posts originally existed! This blog cowers at my whim... MUWAHAHA.
The pope is covered with flesh-eating maggots to signify that he is a total loony.
Much kudos to darkgeneral for helping me figure out some kinks in the Serif PhotoPlus 6 program; thanks to him, I am now able to unveil to you the colored version of the character first displayed (in black and white) back in 12th post.














TODAY'S BOOK: "The Nine Mile Walk and Other Stories", by Harry Kemelman ((c) 1967)

TODAY'S WEBSITE: www.snafu-comics.com Vinson Ngo (better known by his pen name, Bleedman) is absolutely the best webcomic creator/writer/artist I have ever seen. This site hosts three of his comics currently in production--the continuation of each alternates at long stretches, with him currently working on the one called "Sugar Bits". The other two are manga-esque spinoffs of The Powerpuff Girls and The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy containing clever cameos galore by cartoon characters both past and present (and it is a testimony to his skills that he can hold my interest in ANYTHING manga-esque). Also contains comics by other people, whatever rocks your boat. Warning: some graphic content. Keep out of reach of children.

Labels: cartoon, random, the blog

Fifty-nine LIX licks his chops chop chopping block beheading guillotine French Revolution French bread pain "To the pain" The Princess Bride Marriage miscarriage of justice scales fins fish fishing pole rod Rod Carew batting average Mendoza Line 200 300 Greeks Greek to me incomprehensible reprehensible disgusting yuck yak Tibet monks saffron color rainbow rain falling from sky falling down ground grounded in room stuck trapped trappers furriers coonskin caps Davy Crockett the Alamo battle war destruction atom bomb nuclear nucleus center Grand Central Station trains maglev magnets poles North Pole polar bears white White Cliffs of Dover cliffhanger suspense intrigue interesting fascinating Fascists totalitarianism dictator dictation stenography calligraphy ink brush paint painting Picasso cubism cubes cubicles work job Book of Job morning moaning grumping Grumpy Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs Disney animation animated moving moving house new place unknown hidden hiding Hide and Seek game entertainment Now That's Entertainment! actors Hollywood fame fame and fortune wealth treasure buried treasure pirates piracy stealing crime criminals jail locked up locks lock of hair Samson strongman wrestler WWE WWF nature green green thumb gardener Professor Sprout brussel sprouts gross G.R.O.S.S. clubs cavemen Geico TV shows 60 Minutes minus one equals fifty-nine.

TODAY'S BOOK: "The Steel of Raithskar", by Randall Garrett and Vicki Ann Heydron ((c) 1981)

Labels: free association

Naturally, no song can compete with the sheer randomness of "The Llama Song" (featured earlier in this blog under a post of the same name), but some come pretty close. A shining example is Weird Al Yankovic's "Everything You Know is Wrong" (Hysterically well-made screenshot AMV at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGC09B810Yk), a veritable exercise in free-association lyrics. Just ICYDK, Weird Al's "Your Horoscope For Today" has also been featured here, which both showcases his tendency toward randomness and helps explain why he is one of my favorite singers. But I digress:

"I was driving on the freeway in the fast lane/With a rabid wolverine in my underwear/When suddenly a guy behind me in the back seat/Popped right up and cupped his hands across my eyes
I guessed, 'Is it Uncle Frank or Cousin Louie?/'Is it Bob or Joe or Walter?/'Could it be Bill or Jim or Ed or Bernie or Steve?'/I probably would have kept on guessing/But about that time we crashed into the truck
And as I'm laying bleeding there on the asphalt/Finally I recognize the face of my hibachi dealer/Who takes off his prosthetic lips and tells me

Everything you know is wrong/Black is white, up is down and short is long/And everything you thought was just so important doesn't matter/Everything you know is wrong/Just forget the words and sing along/All you need to understand is/Everything you know is wrong

I was walkin' to the kitchen for some Golden Grahams/When I accidentally stepped into an alternate dimension/And soon I was abducted by some aliens from space/Who kinda looked like Jamie Farr
They sucked out my internal organs/And they took some Polaroids/And said I was a darn good sport/And as a way of saying thank you/They offered to transport me back to any point in history that I would care to go
And so I had them send me back to last Thursday night so I could pay my phone bill on time/Just then the floating disembodied head of Colonel Sanders started yelling

Everything you know is wrong/Black is white, up is down and short is long/And everything you thought was just so important doesn't matter/Everything you know is wrong/Just forget the words and sing along/All you need to understand is/Everything you know is wrong

I was just about to mail a letter to my evil twin/When I got a nasty paper cut/And, well, to make a long story short/It got infected and I died
So now I'm up in heaven with St. Peter by the Pearly Gates/And it's obvious he doesn't like the Nehru jacket that I'm wearing/He tells me that they've got a dress code
Well, he lets me into heaven anyway/But I get the room next to the noisy ice machine for all eternity/And every day he runs by screaming

Everything you know is wrong/Black is white, up is down and short is long/And everything you used to think was so important/Doesn't really matter anymore/Because the simple fact remains that/Everything you know is wrong/Just forget the words and sing along/All you need to understand is/Everything you know is wrong/Everything you know is wrong"


TODAY'S BOOK: "Lost Horizon", by James Hilton ((c) 1933)

Labels: song

Labels: random