Thursday, September 23, 2010
378th post
I have only one thing to say about this year's American political voting season:
This guy is awesome.
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Secret of Platform 13", by Eva Ibbotson ((c) 1994)
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Secret of Platform 13", by Eva Ibbotson ((c) 1994)
Labels: empty-headed people, picture, random
Monday, July 12, 2010
369th post
9,000 DAYS, people.
Another milestone comes and passes...
TODAY'S BOOK: "East is East", by George Mikes ((c) 1958)
Another milestone comes and passes...
TODAY'S BOOK: "East is East", by George Mikes ((c) 1958)
Monday, July 05, 2010
368th post
The New Adventures of Little Toot has got to be one of the most obscure animated movies of all time. I can barely find any proof for its existence on the Internet, and its entire IMDb entry was written by me. (Thankfully, I'd had the foresight to preserve the cast list for posterity before the videotape got lost.)
Without further ado, here is the only footage I can find from it--the movie's sole song (except for the one during the credits), "Percy's Perfect Purple Pickled Pelican Pellets":
It's quite obvious the animators were heavily influenced by "Pink Elephants on Parade" from Dumbo. To quote from one of only two reviews for this film on Amazon.com, this song "will rob you of your sanity". So you can thank me once they take you away (ho ho, hee hee, ha ha) to the funny farm!
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Dosadi Experiment", by Frank Herbert ((c) 1977)
Without further ado, here is the only footage I can find from it--the movie's sole song (except for the one during the credits), "Percy's Perfect Purple Pickled Pelican Pellets":
It's quite obvious the animators were heavily influenced by "Pink Elephants on Parade" from Dumbo. To quote from one of only two reviews for this film on Amazon.com, this song "will rob you of your sanity". So you can thank me once they take you away (ho ho, hee hee, ha ha) to the funny farm!
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Dosadi Experiment", by Frank Herbert ((c) 1977)
Labels: random
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
366th post
This will make absolutely no sense to anyone but myself.
What if our homemade Bat Mitzvah movie (Officially known as "Sibling Wars/Everyone Has a Little Sister", mentioned last month in the 361st post), had a TVTropes entry? Let me find out. You can all ignore this and stare at the lovely nonexistent wallpaper.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Digital Fortress", by Dan Brown ((c) 1998)
What if our homemade Bat Mitzvah movie (Officially known as "Sibling Wars/Everyone Has a Little Sister", mentioned last month in the 361st post), had a TVTropes entry? Let me find out. You can all ignore this and stare at the lovely nonexistent wallpaper.
- Acting For Two: Y. plays both himself and Agent J.A.C.O.B., who interviews him at one point. This leads to a double listing in the credits.
* M. is himself and the Bum.
* S. is also the car's driver, as well as doing the voiceover for Agent J.A.C.O.B.'s superior and the "Bum Review" introduction. - All Girls Love Ponies: True fact!
- Big Lipped Alligator Moment: The "Bum Review" was tacked on to the end as nothing more than a private in-joke, and will make no sense to those who don't know of the original.
- Cloud Cuckoolander: Y.. Oh so very, very much.
- Crazy Homeless Person: The Bum.
- Creative Closing Credits
- Crowning Moment of Awesome: "Let's make a new deal."
* S. directed, shot and edited the footage almost entirely on his own in under a month. - Crowning Moment of Funny: "Catch the rubber ducky!"
* The footage for Y.'s second credit, the lone remnant of a scrapped blooper reel.
* Let's face it, Y. himself is pretty much a walking CMOF.
* "Expelliarmus!" - Crowning Moment of Heartwarming: The answers to the final question, and Agent J.A.C.O.B.'s epilogue narration.
- Crowning Music of Awesome: The Jason Bourne theme plays over the end credits.
- Evil Laugh: S.. Quite terrifying, actually.
- Expy: The "Bum Review".
- Fun With Acronyms/Meaningful Name: Agent J.A.C.O.B., referring to his real name.
- Heavy Sleeper: E..
- I Just Shot Marvin In The Face: Testing your magic wand while pointing it at yourself isn't the brightest of ideas.
- Narm Charm: Four brothers get together and decide to film a silly, often incoherent skit for their sister's Bat Mitzvah? What's not to like?
- Recycled Soundtrack: Snippets from the theme tunes of Mission Impossible, The Pink Panther, and Harry Potter are used as background music.
- Rule Of Funny: Many of the answers.
- Running Gag: E. really likes sleeping.
- Shout Out: The Title Sequence painstakingly mimics that of The Phantom Menace.
* For no reason at all, the characters begin referencing Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End:
Y: What are you doing?
S: What are you doing??
Y: What are you doing??
S: What are you doing???
Y: No, what aarrre you doing????? - Take That Me: Everybody play Flanderizations of themselves to one degree or another. Basically the whole point of the movie really.
- The Voice: Agent J.A.C.O.B.'s superior. Also a Large Ham.
- Trigger Happy/Disproportionate Retribution: S.'s response when someone interrupts his reading is to try to perform the Avada Kedavra spell. Then again, it seems to be his default spell anyway...
TODAY'S BOOK: "Digital Fortress", by Dan Brown ((c) 1998)
Labels: random
Friday, June 04, 2010
"The Running Man"
READY!
See the man, running through the maze.
WAKA WAKA WAKA WAKA
See the helmet. It is yellow, like his suit. It resembles a pizza pie with a slice missing.
WAKA WAKA WAKA WAKA
See...
The letters stenciled above his tinted visor...
P A C
WAKA WAKA WAKA WAKA
The man runs. He cannot remember why he is here; indeed, he cannot remember if he ever did know. All the PAC Man knows are the maze, the pills...
...He turns a corner and stops dead...
...the pursuit.
One of Them is advancing down the path right now. He does not know if they are ghosts, or demons, or some nameless eldritch abomination. The only thing he knows about Them is this:
They must not catch him.
He turns and flees, picking up pills all the way.
He does not know what the pills are for. They are tasteless, scentless, and (as far as he can tell) have no nutritional value. The only sustenance he receives is placed at a certain spot by a person or persons unknown—the ones responsible for his being here? Who knows?—at regular intervals, disappearing as mysteriously as it appears.
The PAC Man runs...
For all his speed and cunning, he would be dead by now were it not for the glowing orbs.
He must have found out about the orbs quite early on, for he can't remember not knowing the effect grabbing one had on Them. He has escaped from more than one jam that way. They turn blue, and flee from him in fear, knowing that now, and only now, are they vulnerable.
He could not deny the sheer pleasure vanishing one of Them gave him, but as time went by they returned to the chase. They always returned.
He hasn't seen a glowing orb for a while.
Sometimes, he is so exhausted from running that he will begin to hallucinate. He imagines he sees a wife, a female doppelganger of himself; or a child; or some sort of teacher or professor.
But they all fade away, and he is once more alone.
Alone but for Them.
He has been running for so very long.
And They have become faster. Smarter.
Hungrier.
See the man running, the sound accompanying him, emanating from everywhere and nowhere.
WAKA WAKA WAKA—
From the left—!
From the right!
They close in on him, two of Them, in a pincer movement. The man stifles an oath, and ducks into the only opening available.
It's a dead end.
He stumbles to a halt a few feet from the wall, two more pills in front of him.
He whips around. The two from before have entered the pathway. A third follows them in.
No escape.
He looks back down at the pills—the last two pills.
He has been running for so very, very long...
The hell with it, he decides.
See the PAC Man, turning and running headlong towards the relentless foe...
GAME OVER
INSERT COIN? (y/n)
INSERT COIN? (y/n)
TODAY'S BOOK: "Ice Station", by Matt Reilly ((c) 1998)
Labels: random
Monday, March 22, 2010
355th post
Tomorrow will be Jonathan Pollard's 8,888th consecutive day in prison.
There's nothing terribly significant about the fact in and of itself. It's just a number. 8 8 8 8. It just means that 8,887 days of jailtime have already passed, with G-d only knows how many more to go.
Jonathan Pollard is a spy.
Perhaps you may have noticed I keep a running tally of Pollard's days at the bottom left of the blog. It's not automatic, so I have to sign in every day and update it in the template. It helps me remember.
No one should ever forget Jonathan Pollard.
In case you don't know who he is, and you probably don't, here's the score: Jonathan Jay Pollard, a Jewish American intelligence analyst, was recruited by Israel's secret service to pass on to them classified information. The reports Pollard passed on did not contain information about the American military, but rather were about enemy countries--reports that America should have been passing along to Israel (a friendly nation), but wasn't.
Jonathan Pollard was discovered and tracked down; when he sought sanctuary at the Israeli Embassy in Washington, he was kicked out (!). At his trial, Pollard entered a plea bargain by which he would plead guilty and therefore receive a reduced sentence, in addition to cooperating fully with the governmental investigation. Instead, at the last minute, the judge sentenced him to life in prison without parole, based on "secret evidence" submitted by then-Secretary of Defense Caspar Weinberger that only he saw.
Pollard's lawyer forgot to submit an appeal before the deadline (!!), sealing the deal.
Jonathan Pollard has now been in a maximum security prison for eight thousand, eight hundred and eighty-seven days. That's twenty-five years, four months and one day. He is serving the longest American prison sentence ever handed down to a spy of an ally nation. Just to compare, David Barnett (KGB spy) received 18 years, David Boone (USSR) was sentenced to 24 and a third, Chi Mak (China) got 24.5. Andrew Daulton Lee served 18 years; William Kampiles was sentenced to 20 years and served 18; Christopher Boyce served 25 of 40; Ronald Pelton is scheduled for release in 2015. The list goes on. Recently, Ronald Montaperto--who passed classified information to China for over a decade--got sentenced to three months in jail.
Let me reiterate: Jonathan Pollard is serving a life sentence without parole.
This is unconsciable.
The United States needs to free Jonathan Pollard. The man has served 25 years in jail, incarcerated alongside murderers and rapists, for a crime that did not harm national security, and is now sick with a variety of illnesses.
It's time to end this debacle. It's time to let Jonathan Pollard go.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Fast-Talking Dolphin", by Carson Davidson ((c) 1978)
There's nothing terribly significant about the fact in and of itself. It's just a number. 8 8 8 8. It just means that 8,887 days of jailtime have already passed, with G-d only knows how many more to go.
Jonathan Pollard is a spy.
Perhaps you may have noticed I keep a running tally of Pollard's days at the bottom left of the blog. It's not automatic, so I have to sign in every day and update it in the template. It helps me remember.
No one should ever forget Jonathan Pollard.
In case you don't know who he is, and you probably don't, here's the score: Jonathan Jay Pollard, a Jewish American intelligence analyst, was recruited by Israel's secret service to pass on to them classified information. The reports Pollard passed on did not contain information about the American military, but rather were about enemy countries--reports that America should have been passing along to Israel (a friendly nation), but wasn't.
Jonathan Pollard was discovered and tracked down; when he sought sanctuary at the Israeli Embassy in Washington, he was kicked out (!). At his trial, Pollard entered a plea bargain by which he would plead guilty and therefore receive a reduced sentence, in addition to cooperating fully with the governmental investigation. Instead, at the last minute, the judge sentenced him to life in prison without parole, based on "secret evidence" submitted by then-Secretary of Defense Caspar Weinberger that only he saw.
Pollard's lawyer forgot to submit an appeal before the deadline (!!), sealing the deal.
Jonathan Pollard has now been in a maximum security prison for eight thousand, eight hundred and eighty-seven days. That's twenty-five years, four months and one day. He is serving the longest American prison sentence ever handed down to a spy of an ally nation. Just to compare, David Barnett (KGB spy) received 18 years, David Boone (USSR) was sentenced to 24 and a third, Chi Mak (China) got 24.5. Andrew Daulton Lee served 18 years; William Kampiles was sentenced to 20 years and served 18; Christopher Boyce served 25 of 40; Ronald Pelton is scheduled for release in 2015. The list goes on. Recently, Ronald Montaperto--who passed classified information to China for over a decade--got sentenced to three months in jail.
Let me reiterate: Jonathan Pollard is serving a life sentence without parole.
This is unconsciable.
The United States needs to free Jonathan Pollard. The man has served 25 years in jail, incarcerated alongside murderers and rapists, for a crime that did not harm national security, and is now sick with a variety of illnesses.
It's time to end this debacle. It's time to let Jonathan Pollard go.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Fast-Talking Dolphin", by Carson Davidson ((c) 1978)
Labels: random
Friday, March 12, 2010
353rd post
"If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?"
--joke received from the Interwebs, c. 2005
Mother (translating a document): "What's the opposite of 'progress'?"
Me: "Congress!!!"
--today
March Hare: "Why don't you start at the beginning?"
Mad Hatter: "Yes! And when you reach the end--stop."
--Alice in Wonderland, first viewed c. 2009
Man in synagogue (to chazzan): "Start from the beginning!"
Me: "And when you reach the end--stop!"
--tonight
--joke received from the Interwebs, c. 2005
Mother (translating a document): "What's the opposite of 'progress'?"
Me: "Congress!!!"
--today
March Hare: "Why don't you start at the beginning?"
Mad Hatter: "Yes! And when you reach the end--stop."
--Alice in Wonderland, first viewed c. 2009
Man in synagogue (to chazzan): "Start from the beginning!"
Me: "And when you reach the end--stop!"
--tonight
Labels: random
Tuesday, March 02, 2010
Elegant weapons for a more or less civilized age
Curious about my Purim costume's weaponry? Probably not, but here's what they were constructed of anyway!
Main body is drum tripod. Special timer attached to right side with belt; copper pot knob-piece taped on for olde timey funke ambience. Laser scope from brother's BB gun taped to top. Gear meter of bicycle attached to top left side. Computer power cable stuck into bottom. Chair wheel inserted into "barrel". Gear-like pieces from my electric shaver attached to lower front with inside of twist-tie.
Meter and cable attach back to...
Main body is a mixer. Asthma inhaler lashed to one side. More pieces from shaver taped to front, as well as computer cable. Gear meter snaked into hole on side.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Just So Stories", by Rudyard Kipling ((c) 1902)
Der Zwei-X Raygun, Mk. II
Main body is drum tripod. Special timer attached to right side with belt; copper pot knob-piece taped on for olde timey funke ambience. Laser scope from brother's BB gun taped to top. Gear meter of bicycle attached to top left side. Computer power cable stuck into bottom. Chair wheel inserted into "barrel". Gear-like pieces from my electric shaver attached to lower front with inside of twist-tie.
Meter and cable attach back to...
Der Zwei-X Powersourcen Mit Optional Blastenpiece
Main body is a mixer. Asthma inhaler lashed to one side. More pieces from shaver taped to front, as well as computer cable. Gear meter snaked into hole on side.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Just So Stories", by Rudyard Kipling ((c) 1902)
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Sknil backwards
www.badassoftheweek.com Exactly What It Says On The Tin. Every week, another badass living or (usually) historical figure is described in the most glowing and hyperbolic terms possible. Testosterone poisoning ahoy, even for the ladies!
www.mylifeisaverage.com Used to be Exactly What Is Says Etc., but not anymore. Now it's basically a free-for-all to see who can describe--with brevity--unusual happenstances that for some reason always occur "yesterday". Harmless and enjoyable fluff; seems to be picking up posting speed.
www.givesmehope.com Women, break out the tissues; men, pull up your sleeves. Each and every story on this amazing site is guaranteed to restore your hope in the human race and not leave a dry eye in the house.
Excuse me.
*HONK*
www.collectedcurios.com/sequentialart.php Add another webcomic to the list! This one's about a guy named Art, a catgirl named Kat and a giant green penguin (Pip). Oh, and there's an ADD squirrel-girl in there called Scarlet who is voiced in my head by Ellen DeGeneres. Awesomeness doesn't get much crazier than this, folks!
cheezburger.com/sites This is not addition but a name change. Remember I Can Has Cheezburger? They've expanded into an entire Cheezburger Network, covering everything from wedding pictures and graphs to cute babies and Facebook stupidity. With 36 separate offshoots and counting, say hello to hours of laughs!
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Making of 'The African Queen', or: How I Went to Africa with Bogie, Bacall and Huston and Almost Lost My Mind", by Katharine Hepburn ((c) 1987)
www.mylifeisaverage.com Used to be Exactly What Is Says Etc., but not anymore. Now it's basically a free-for-all to see who can describe--with brevity--unusual happenstances that for some reason always occur "yesterday". Harmless and enjoyable fluff; seems to be picking up posting speed.
www.givesmehope.com Women, break out the tissues; men, pull up your sleeves. Each and every story on this amazing site is guaranteed to restore your hope in the human race and not leave a dry eye in the house.
Excuse me.
*HONK*
www.collectedcurios.com/sequentialart.php Add another webcomic to the list! This one's about a guy named Art, a catgirl named Kat and a giant green penguin (Pip). Oh, and there's an ADD squirrel-girl in there called Scarlet who is voiced in my head by Ellen DeGeneres. Awesomeness doesn't get much crazier than this, folks!
cheezburger.com/sites This is not addition but a name change. Remember I Can Has Cheezburger? They've expanded into an entire Cheezburger Network, covering everything from wedding pictures and graphs to cute babies and Facebook stupidity. With 36 separate offshoots and counting, say hello to hours of laughs!
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Making of 'The African Queen', or: How I Went to Africa with Bogie, Bacall and Huston and Almost Lost My Mind", by Katharine Hepburn ((c) 1987)
Labels: random
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Last night
I was in a hotel. Don't ask me to explain how I knew it was a hotel, it just was. I think I've been there on previous excursions.
So my shirt disappeared and I went outside through the revolving door, then back in, then out again. And I found myself in my old building's lobby.
I went to the elevator (which was in front of me instead of to the left, oddly enough) and waited for it along with some other folks who walked. There were both men and women. I think one of the men was bald.
Then we went into the elevator and the scene shifted to the elevator now outside the building, going up at an angle instead of straight. I remember thinking, "Oh yeah, I forgot that elevator did this", even though it never actually did. Also, it had no roof.
Some more people got on.
I was completely calm throughout all of this.
We stopped at my floor and I went in. There was a long hallway, on the left were animals that looked like CGI images exhibited in pens. As I walked down the hall, one of the animals, a bull species called a "Fencebreaker", destroyed its enclosure. I walked past and mentioned to a security guard.
As I kept walking I saw more animal exhibits that had been destroyed or something.
Then I turned a corner and found out who was responsible for this: the Joker. A scene from Batman: The Animated Series played out on a giant screen.
And then I woke up.
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Voice of Liberty: The Story of Emma Lazarus", by Eve Merriam ((c) 1959)
So my shirt disappeared and I went outside through the revolving door, then back in, then out again. And I found myself in my old building's lobby.
I went to the elevator (which was in front of me instead of to the left, oddly enough) and waited for it along with some other folks who walked. There were both men and women. I think one of the men was bald.
Then we went into the elevator and the scene shifted to the elevator now outside the building, going up at an angle instead of straight. I remember thinking, "Oh yeah, I forgot that elevator did this", even though it never actually did. Also, it had no roof.
Some more people got on.
I was completely calm throughout all of this.
We stopped at my floor and I went in. There was a long hallway, on the left were animals that looked like CGI images exhibited in pens. As I walked down the hall, one of the animals, a bull species called a "Fencebreaker", destroyed its enclosure. I walked past and mentioned to a security guard.
As I kept walking I saw more animal exhibits that had been destroyed or something.
Then I turned a corner and found out who was responsible for this: the Joker. A scene from Batman: The Animated Series played out on a giant screen.
And then I woke up.
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Voice of Liberty: The Story of Emma Lazarus", by Eve Merriam ((c) 1959)
Labels: biographical, random
Saturday, November 07, 2009
Amazing fact of the day
Prince Randian (birth name unknown), born without arms or legs, could shave, write, and paint; roll cigarettes and then light them; and was an accomplished carpenter to boot. He could also speak speak four languages, and he remained married to the same woman his entire life, raising a family of four children.
Kind of puts your petty complaints into perspective, doesn't it.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Amadans", by Malachy Doyle ((c) 2004)
Kind of puts your petty complaints into perspective, doesn't it.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Amadans", by Malachy Doyle ((c) 2004)
Labels: random
Monday, October 19, 2009
Three-year anniversary
Boy, I've really been neglecting this blog, haven't I? Quite a bit of time had to pass before I'd realized this milestone had been reached.
But better late than never! (Or pregnant. But that's a whole 'nother story.)
What's happened since the last, first anniversary?
Sea-of-Green and her Hoosier Journal of Inanity reach out
Where am I on Google?
Finally, the ShiurTimes has gotten around to listing me on its Contributors page.
Deconstructing mayoral campaign slogans
The final edumacational year kicks off
How much do I have?
All my 32s
Disappointing election results...
My first Internet rant
...twice.
something completely different
Kurt Busiek is awesome
Your Horoscope For Today arrives
The top 32 results for a Google search of "32"
15, a new record for posts in a calendar month
Citius, Fortius, Satius
The most memorable part of an otherwise forgettable movie
Babes aplenty... and a ballcock
It doesn't count as "work" if you have fun doing it
What does all day and Ctrl+V make?
The World's Greatest Criminal Mind is #1
A list of lists finishes off List Month
16, a new record for posts in a calendar month (no, that's not a typo)
The best darn TV commercial ever
Scraping the bottom of the gags barrel
My first ever foray into animation
I'M HOLDING KURT BUSIEK OVER MY HEAD!!!
Please just watch this.
The Wakka Wakkas have their revenge
So do the smocks
Bill Stickers is innocent
Your Horoscope For Today leaves
The deliberately incaustic cartoon
When I first saw this... my eyes bugged out and I began slapping my face hysterically.
The revenge of the injury that was never even remotely funny
Spam addresses
Darth Obvius resurfaces
The ShiurTimes is renamed, ZOMGBBQ
The blog's three thousandth
What a lark. Not!
A little bit
"Blue Beetle" quotes
My first AMV inclusion
The All-Villain Baseball Team
Good luck and Godspeed, guys.
Speculation on Spider-man's middle name and bashing Batman
Reactions to my first fanfic
My less modest contribution to Let's Glorify Guy Week
Just all seriousnessositiness
12 out of 30 MLB teams (40%) begin the season with 32s on their rosters
I saw a lion charging in real life!
An Illustrated room
A look at the babbles' subject
I started off with Ellen Raskin as "mesmerizing".
Worries...
That's not how you spell Cappuccino or Frappuccino
The top 28 uploadable results for a Google Images search of "32"
Parting ways with the IsraTimes
The greatest Metly 32
The Jerusalem Post. Wow. Just... wow.
Furious Five humanized
First jpost.com cartoon
Creating a second blog for my artwork
Political cartoons switch over to The Eighth Day
How the All-Star Game became so fleeped up
and four thousandth hits.
Pretty hoity-toity, given that I've got 12 more years to reach that plateau
Together, they fight CRIME.
"Son of man, can these bones live?"
Star Trek: DS9 and Rule 34
and another little bit of YouTube and myself dies
As soon as he saw the duck, Elmer knew it was going to be a bad day.
A whole mess of introductions
Mispelled is misspelled
"Demonstrates defenestration"!
Milagro and her friends will kick your butt
Hallelujah, Abigail...
The final edumacational year comes to a close
Who knows what another year will bring Giant Boogers from Outer Space? Hopefully less apathy.
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Ellimist Chronicles", by K.A. Applegate ((c) 2000)
But better late than never! (Or pregnant. But that's a whole 'nother story.)
What's happened since the last, first anniversary?
Sea-of-Green and her Hoosier Journal of Inanity reach out
Where am I on Google?
Finally, the ShiurTimes has gotten around to listing me on its Contributors page.
Deconstructing mayoral campaign slogans
The final edumacational year kicks off
How much do I have?
All my 32s
Disappointing election results...
My first Internet rant
...twice.
something completely different
Kurt Busiek is awesome
Your Horoscope For Today arrives
The top 32 results for a Google search of "32"
15, a new record for posts in a calendar month
Citius, Fortius, Satius
The most memorable part of an otherwise forgettable movie
Babes aplenty... and a ballcock
It doesn't count as "work" if you have fun doing it
What does all day and Ctrl+V make?
The World's Greatest Criminal Mind is #1
A list of lists finishes off List Month
16, a new record for posts in a calendar month (no, that's not a typo)
The best darn TV commercial ever
Scraping the bottom of the gags barrel
My first ever foray into animation
I'M HOLDING KURT BUSIEK OVER MY HEAD!!!
Please just watch this.
The Wakka Wakkas have their revenge
So do the smocks
Bill Stickers is innocent
Your Horoscope For Today leaves
The deliberately incaustic cartoon
When I first saw this... my eyes bugged out and I began slapping my face hysterically.
The revenge of the injury that was never even remotely funny
Spam addresses
Darth Obvius resurfaces
The ShiurTimes is renamed, ZOMGBBQ
The blog's three thousandth
What a lark. Not!
A little bit
"Blue Beetle" quotes
My first AMV inclusion
The All-Villain Baseball Team
Good luck and Godspeed, guys.
Speculation on Spider-man's middle name and bashing Batman
Reactions to my first fanfic
My less modest contribution to Let's Glorify Guy Week
Just all seriousnessositiness
12 out of 30 MLB teams (40%) begin the season with 32s on their rosters
I saw a lion charging in real life!
An Illustrated room
A look at the babbles' subject
I started off with Ellen Raskin as "mesmerizing".
Worries...
That's not how you spell Cappuccino or Frappuccino
The top 28 uploadable results for a Google Images search of "32"
Parting ways with the IsraTimes
The greatest Metly 32
The Jerusalem Post. Wow. Just... wow.
Furious Five humanized
First jpost.com cartoon
Creating a second blog for my artwork
Political cartoons switch over to The Eighth Day
How the All-Star Game became so fleeped up
and four thousandth hits.
Pretty hoity-toity, given that I've got 12 more years to reach that plateau
Together, they fight CRIME.
"Son of man, can these bones live?"
Star Trek: DS9 and Rule 34
and another little bit of YouTube and myself dies
As soon as he saw the duck, Elmer knew it was going to be a bad day.
A whole mess of introductions
Mispelled is misspelled
"Demonstrates defenestration"!
Milagro and her friends will kick your butt
Hallelujah, Abigail...
The final edumacational year comes to a close
Who knows what another year will bring Giant Boogers from Outer Space? Hopefully less apathy.
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Ellimist Chronicles", by K.A. Applegate ((c) 2000)
Labels: 32, random, the blog, wakka wakka
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Possibly the greatest line of poetry ever written
Bill Watterson, poetic genius.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Marv", by Marilyn Sachs ((c) 1970)
Friday, August 28, 2009
Mispelled Internet words that make me mad
Grizzly instead of grisly
Their instead of they're
Wails/wailing instead of whales/whaling
It's instead of its
Crises instead of crisis, and crisises instead of crises
Teh instead of the
Roll instead of role
Cannon instead of canon
And if you didn't notice that the word "misspelled" in the title has been misspelled, shame on you.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Maximilian, You're the Greatest", by Joseph Rosenbloom ((c) 1979)
Their instead of they're
Wails/wailing instead of whales/whaling
It's instead of its
Crises instead of crisis, and crisises instead of crises
Teh instead of the
Roll instead of role
Cannon instead of canon
And if you didn't notice that the word "misspelled" in the title has been misspelled, shame on you.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Maximilian, You're the Greatest", by Joseph Rosenbloom ((c) 1979)
Labels: random
Monday, August 24, 2009
Snippets from future possible fanfictions
Test Subjects; Disney; rated T
"And the last thing he saw before he blacked out forever was a demonic pair of red eyes..."
Animaniacs: The 10 Year Reunion Special; Animaniacs; rated K-T
"'The first time we all met each other, though, was at the Ted,' he continued as an image of the Theodore J. Valiant Memorial Theater flashed on the screen behind them. Known as 'The Ted' for short, it was one of ToonTown's biggest and most famous entertainment halls, a combination stage theater and multiplex. Countless famous Toons had gotten their start playing at the Ted before an ever-present contingent of talent scouts. 'It was May 2nd, 1992, and they were holding a general talent competition.'
"'What was your planned act?' Douglas inquired.
"'Paddleball juggling,' Jake answered."
Simon & Bongo; Animaniacs; rated K-T
"'By the time the Korean War rolled around, we had become boffo box office thanks to the radio show. No more backing up the headliners on the USO tours; we were the headliners. And how sweet it was.'"
Panic and Hatred in Ankh-Morpork; Discworld; rated T
"'He has two eyes just like any other man, two legs like any other man, two arms, two ears, one nose like any other man, he breathes like any other man, he sweats like any other man, and--' he drew a stiletto and inserted it neatly between two ribs; Hildebiddle's eyes bugged out, then he slumped forward, dead as a doornail-- 'he dies just like any other man.'"
Tale as Old as A'Tuin; Discworld/Beauty and the Beast crossover; rated K+
"Rincewind wandered into the garden. The Luggage was there, perched by the edge of the pond, apparently watching some frogs. One snapped its tongue out and snagged a dinner of fly a la carte.
"Rincewind didn't know why, but he sensed that this was having some significance for the Luggage."
The More Things Change...; Teen Titans; rated K+
"Slade slowly raised a hand to his head. 'My mind,' he whispered. Shock quickly turned to fury. 'You messed with my mind!--'
"In one motion, Slade was on his feet and aiming a punch that was liable to have taken Mnemon's head clean off his shoulders--had Cinderblock not suddenly appeared out of the shadows and grabbed him from behind. As it was, his fist missed Mnemon's face by a fraction of an inch. He didn't even flinch."
TODAY'S BOOK: "Time Flies", by Bill Cosby ((c) 1987)
"And the last thing he saw before he blacked out forever was a demonic pair of red eyes..."
Animaniacs: The 10 Year Reunion Special; Animaniacs; rated K-T
"'The first time we all met each other, though, was at the Ted,' he continued as an image of the Theodore J. Valiant Memorial Theater flashed on the screen behind them. Known as 'The Ted' for short, it was one of ToonTown's biggest and most famous entertainment halls, a combination stage theater and multiplex. Countless famous Toons had gotten their start playing at the Ted before an ever-present contingent of talent scouts. 'It was May 2nd, 1992, and they were holding a general talent competition.'
"'What was your planned act?' Douglas inquired.
"'Paddleball juggling,' Jake answered."
Simon & Bongo; Animaniacs; rated K-T
"'By the time the Korean War rolled around, we had become boffo box office thanks to the radio show. No more backing up the headliners on the USO tours; we were the headliners. And how sweet it was.'"
Panic and Hatred in Ankh-Morpork; Discworld; rated T
"'He has two eyes just like any other man, two legs like any other man, two arms, two ears, one nose like any other man, he breathes like any other man, he sweats like any other man, and--' he drew a stiletto and inserted it neatly between two ribs; Hildebiddle's eyes bugged out, then he slumped forward, dead as a doornail-- 'he dies just like any other man.'"
Tale as Old as A'Tuin; Discworld/Beauty and the Beast crossover; rated K+
"Rincewind wandered into the garden. The Luggage was there, perched by the edge of the pond, apparently watching some frogs. One snapped its tongue out and snagged a dinner of fly a la carte.
"Rincewind didn't know why, but he sensed that this was having some significance for the Luggage."
The More Things Change...; Teen Titans; rated K+
"Slade slowly raised a hand to his head. 'My mind,' he whispered. Shock quickly turned to fury. 'You messed with my mind!--'
"In one motion, Slade was on his feet and aiming a punch that was liable to have taken Mnemon's head clean off his shoulders--had Cinderblock not suddenly appeared out of the shadows and grabbed him from behind. As it was, his fist missed Mnemon's face by a fraction of an inch. He didn't even flinch."
TODAY'S BOOK: "Time Flies", by Bill Cosby ((c) 1987)
Labels: random
Sunday, June 28, 2009
A random piece of wisdom that popped into my head on the bus today
Every day, millions of women use thousands of beauty products to get the "natural look" that millions of other women achieve by just being natural.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Gentleman's Agreement", by Laura Z. Hobson ((c) 1946)
TODAY'S BOOK: "Gentleman's Agreement", by Laura Z. Hobson ((c) 1946)
Labels: random
Friday, May 08, 2009
274th post
These were the top 32 results for a Google Images search for "32", except for the fourth, tenth, twenty-first and twenty-ninth pictures, which refused to upload.
TODAY'S BOOK: "The Battle for the Atlantic", by Jay Williams ((c) 1959)
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Single-Word Synopses of Authors' Writing Styles
Gordon Korman: zestful.
Jerry Spinelli: unflinching.
Louis Sachar: talkative.
Clive Cussler: straightforward.
Eoin Colfer: stark.
Dorothy Gilman: sprightly.
Roger Kahn: sedate.
E.L. Konigsburg: regal.
L. Frank Baum: prosaic.
Roger Angell: pleasing.
Michael Crichton: overanalytical.
Dick Francis: nuanced.
Robert Ludlum: noisy.
Diane Duane: mischievous.
Ellen Raskin: mesmerizing.
Dan Brown: intricate.
Isaac Asimov: intelligent.
Agatha Christie: dry.
Terry Pratchett: cunning.
Hugh Lofting: comfortable.
Raymond Khoury: cliched.
Alistair MacLean: businesslike.
Bill Bryson: brilliant.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Mere Anarchy", by Woody Allen (random) ((c) 2007)
Jerry Spinelli: unflinching.
Louis Sachar: talkative.
Clive Cussler: straightforward.
Eoin Colfer: stark.
Dorothy Gilman: sprightly.
Roger Kahn: sedate.
E.L. Konigsburg: regal.
L. Frank Baum: prosaic.
Roger Angell: pleasing.
Michael Crichton: overanalytical.
Dick Francis: nuanced.
Robert Ludlum: noisy.
Diane Duane: mischievous.
Ellen Raskin: mesmerizing.
Dan Brown: intricate.
Isaac Asimov: intelligent.
Agatha Christie: dry.
Terry Pratchett: cunning.
Hugh Lofting: comfortable.
Raymond Khoury: cliched.
Alistair MacLean: businesslike.
Bill Bryson: brilliant.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Mere Anarchy", by Woody Allen (random) ((c) 2007)
Labels: random
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Post-Pessach Mega Post
- I went to a zoo for the first time in years and had a blast. Penguin feeding, elephant mahouts, humongous rhinoceri and ants feeding on a dead millipede in the parking lot were some of the highlights; but the most thrilling one happened at the lion enclosure. A male and his mate were enjoying a siesta when a completely clueless peahen landed at the other end and squawked loudly. Annoyed, the lion popped his head up and swiveled it like a periscope. What unfolded over the next several minutes was pure eye candy: a lion slowly stalking its prey. Step by step, it crept closer and closer to the oblivious bird, until it stood only a few feet away, with the peahen directly between him and us--front row seats in every sense of the word. After a few breathless seconds, the lion charged.
Even though there was a ditch and an electric fence separating us, my brain automotically got its Primeval Panic button pressed. I must have blacked out for a split second, because try as I might I don't remember actually seeing the peahen take off--but it did, just in the nick of time. [pause] I saw a lion charging in real life. - Another animal spotted at the zoo was a green ring-necked cockatoo. I mention this because one of his Wickersham cousins has been by us for the past three days while his owners (friends of ours) went trippin'. His name's Shrek ('cause he's green, which ain't easy) and his English vocabulary consists of "Shabbat Shalom", "Shrek", and "hello". We've also been petsitting their dog, which I can most certainly do without.
- Over at the ISS, I've continued to roll along, with a mockery of the "2 Girls 1 Cup" concept (and no, I have not seen the video) and a surreal article about anti-anti-hero Marc E. Nibbleshvitz, which I hope to turn into a running series. Watch that space.
- I'm way past the stage of ruing the day I randomly slapped that blowfish picture into the blog. Sure, it attracts hundreds upon hundreds of hits, but I really have absolutely zero idea why. This bugs me no end.
- Let's go Mets! Let's go Mets! Let's go Mets! Let's go Mets!
- The Jew, the elder statesman, the metalhead, the Three Professors (Dr. Texas, Dr. Deep South, Dr. Midwest), the Star Wars fanatic, the emo, the couple, the Twilight hater, the social antisocialist, the mathematician, the Wiccan, the radical Leftist, the New Zealander, the Lord of the Rings geek, the South American, and assorted members of Generations X and ZOMG all invite you to visit TitansGo.net today along with them!
- Wakka! Wakka wakka wakka. Wak wak. Wakka wakka wak wakka wakka wak wakka wak wakka. Wakka, wak wakka wak wak, wakka wakka. Wakka. Wakka wakka wakka. Wak wakka, wakka.
- Why all the writing? Well, it's precisely what I was forbidden to do during Chol HaMoed Pessach. Drawing, too. Now I've got a week's worth of pent-up words and images flowing out at a fantastic rate. I'm now busy not on one, but three separate fanfictions, and several illustrations. But not for the IsraTimes, until they resume sending me their issues, because I feel that some compensation is due for me.
TODAY'S BOOK: "Vixen 03", by Clive Cussler ((c) 1978)
Labels: baseball, biographical, random, the blog, wakka wakka
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Apparently, Peter Parker's middle name is Calvin.
The Spectacular Spider-Man #27 (June 2005)
The snowmen are even drawn in a Watterson-y style. Plus, we also know he has a rich fantasy life because the issue is devoted to him talking to an imaginary Uncle Ben (Ben Hobbes Parker?). Later on in The Amazing Spider-Man #536 (November '06), he also carries on a conversation with his younger self (pictured: a snippet).
Bonus!
GLBF! is having another Bash Batman Week, and I've decided to chip in this time with a little vignette from The Batman Adventures #25 (Nov. 1994). Cheers!
TODAY'S BOOK: "Tuesday the Rabbi Saw Red", by Harry Kemelman ((c) 1973)
