This is the third time I'm transcribing a Weird Al Yankovic song for the blog, but what can I say? The dude's intensely random! Watch the music video at www.youtube.com/watch?v=qEB0Xe2e76I, then come back here and catch all the verses you missed:

"Put down your chainsaw and listen to me/It's time for us to join in the fight/It's time to let your babies grow up to be cowboys/It's time to let the bedbugs bite
You better put all your eggs in one basket/You better count your chickens before they hatch/You better sell some wine before its time/You better find yourself an itch to scratch
You better squeeze all the Charmin you can while Mr. Whipple's not around/Stick your head in the microwave and get yourself a tan
Talk with your mouth full/Bite the hand that feeds you/Bite off more than you chew/What can you do?/Dare to be stupid
Take some wooden nickels/Look for Mr. Goodbar/Get your mojo working now/I'll show you how/You can dare to be stupid
You can turn the other cheek/You can just give up the ship/You can eat a bunch of sushi and forget to leave a tip

Dare to be stupid/Come on and dare to be stupid/It's so easy to do/Dare to be stupid/We're all waiting for you/Let's go

It's time to make a mountain out of a molehill/So can I have a volunteer?/There's no more time for crying over spilled milk/Now it's time for crying in your beer
Settle down, raise a family, join the PTA/Buy some sensible shoes and a Chevrolet/Then party 'til you're broke and they drag you away/It's OK, you can dare to be stupid
It's like spitting on a fish/It's like barking up a tree/It's like they said you gotta buy one if you wanna get one free

Dare to be stupid (yes!)/Why don't you dare to be stupid/It's so easy to do/Dare to be stupid/We're all waiting for you/Dare to be stupid

Burn your candle at both ends/Look a gift horse in the mouth/Mashed potatoes can be your friend
You can be a coffee achiever/You can sit around the house and watch Leave It To Beaver/The future's up to you/So what you gonna do?/Dare to be stupid/Dare to be stupid

What did I say?/Dare to be stupid/Tell me, what did I say?/Dare to be stupid/It's all right/Dare to be stupid/We can be stupid all night/Dare to be stupid/Come on and join the crowd/Dare to be stupid/Shout it out loud/Dare to be stupid/I can't hear you/Dare to be stupid/OK, I can hear you now/Dare to be stupid/Let's go/Dare to be stupid/Dare to be stupid/Dare to be stupid/Dare to be stupid/Dare to be stupid/Dare to be stupid/Dare to be stupid/Dare to be stupid"


TODAY'S BOOK: "Another Fine Myth", by Robert L. Asprin ((c) 1978)

Labels: song

It's the most random thing I've heard in my life and my #2 favorite song ever, but the story doesn't end there. Burton Earny's head-spinning ode to confusion has inspired several spinoffs and parodies, two of which I find meritorious enough to include here!
First, there's the meme-filled "The Badger Song" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6bUQAPlyNb4):

"Here's a badger/There's a badger/And another little badger/Fuzzy badger/Funny badger/Badger badger/Snake
Badger badger/Mario Brother/Weebl/Bob/Potato/Badger/Badger badger/Mushroom/Badger/Badger badger/Snake
I was once in Kenya/I lived in a pie/If you say this loop will end/That's a vicious lie/I was only three years dead/Just forget Norway/All your base belong to us/Numa Numa Yay
If you ever circle badger/Hold a badger/Rob the Badger/Trails of badger/Salad Fingers/Badger badger/Snake
Half a badger/Twice a badger/Not a badger/Farmer/Badger/Badger with a badge/A German badger/Badger/Snake
Yes, you are an idiot/You are made of poo/Qrrbrbirlbel/Zeeky Boogy Doog/(Boom)/Now my modem's getting slow/Orange slayed the rake/I'm going to restart now/And go play some Snake"

But even better, especially for the mathematically inclined, is "The Gamma Song" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u328PglVpLU):

"Here's a Gamma/There's a Gamma/And another little Gamma/Real Gamma/Virtual Gamma/Gamma Gamma/Look!
Gamma Gamma/Reimann Gamma/Tangent/Wick-rotate/A Gamma/Gamma Gamma/Square root Gamma/Gamma Gamma/Look!
I was once a tensor/I lived in a space/But I never saw the way/The indices were raised/I was just an A-Mu/But that fixed the gauge/And now listen, little child/To this verbiage
Did you ever see a Gamma/Miss a Gamma/Hit a Gamma/Gamma's Gamma/Curve of Gamma/Gamma Gamma/Look!
Affine Gamma/Dirac Gamma/Chiral Gamma/Basu/Gamma/Gamma with psi-bar/A drama/Gamma Gamma/Look!
Is it all in bold now?/Is this all so weird?/Is it made of tangent bundle?/H-cross/Sigma/Beard/Now our song is losing spin/We've run out of/Look!/Time for me to retire now/And become a crook"

Why, even I'm becoming inspired by all this randomness!

"Here's a Yoda/There's a Yoda/And another little Yoda/Grumpy Yoda/Funny Yoda/Yoda Yoda/Luke
Yoda Yoda/Death Star/Yoda/Vader/Fett/Han Solo/Yoda/Yoda Yoda/Qui-Gon/Yoda/Yoda Yoda/Luke
I was once a Jedi/I lived on Dagobah/Then one day an X-Wing came/Blah blah blah blah blah/In ROTJ I was dead/Thus unfolds the tale/And now listen here, Skywalker/To the safety rail
Did you ever see a Yoda/Carry Yoda/On the Yoda/Yoda Yoda/Gimer stick/A Yoda/Yoda/Luke
Half a Yoda/Twice the Yoda/Not a Yoda/Owen/Yoda/Yoda with a cold/A moldy Yoda/Yoda/Luke
Is this how it ends now?/Can I die in peace?/Obi-Wan Kenobi/Jabba/Leia/Artoo/Binks??/Guess you have the answer now/We've run out of luck/Lucas has come back again/And the prequels suck"

Yay!

TODAY'S BOOK: "The Amazing Mets", by Jerry Mitchell ((c) 1970)

YOUR HOROSCOPE FOR TODAY: Forget it.

Labels: parody, song

Ignore the spelling mistakes and please just watch this.

TODAY'S BOOK: "Stepping on the Cracks", by Mary Downing Hahn ((c) 1991)

Labels: :(, song

High hoe! Time to revive this aspect of GBFOS and bring you another greatly random song, but with a twist--it's in Hebrew. Fear not, though, translation is provided by yours truly.
The first time I--and the rest of my family--heard this song, the whole car burst out with laughter after the very first verse...












"Yechezkel Ben Buzi/Sits in a Jacuzzi/And fires with an Uzi/In every direction
And his wife Tzipporah/Her mouth is like a sewer/She dances a Hora/Awfully
Very soon you will dance/The future is pink/The sons are in India/And the daughters in China What a fantasy/Soon will be Messiah/The forecaster promises/Snow and a heatwave

It's simply unthinkable/It's simply unthinkable
The country's going mad/And from this my heart bleeds
The country's under hypnosis/With no anaesthetic or narcotic
Give some Valium or Prozac/I feel bad, I'm fainting

Toto, Lotto, Payis/All of the homeless/Will clap their hands/They'll receive a million
Two thousand years have passed/Let's drink a "L'Chayim"/And meanwhile cast/An eye on Zion
The eye is viewing/The eye is crying/The eye is waiting/For the other eye
Let us all jump/Young forever/And in our heart a wound/And a fresh bruise

It's simply unthinkable/It's simply unthinkable
The country's going mad/And from this my heart bleeds
The country's under hypnosis/With no anaesthetic or narcotic
Give some Valium or Prozac/I feel bad, I'm fainting

The land of the panana/And the insanity/The land of the banana/And the red cherries
Soon's the Fast of Gedaliah/You'll all get a medallion/This is actuality/It's unacceptable"


TODAY'S BOOK: "For Mets Fans Only", by Rich Wolfe ((c) 2006)

TODAY'S WEBSITE: www.authentichistory.com/2000s/20010911/comics/01.html September 11th continues to be my biggest obsession of American History That Occurred In My Lifetime (partly because my uncle used to work at the WTC--he's fine). Here you'll find how 9/11 played out in comic books during that period.

Labels: song, translation

via
The stature, much hour is one...
Immovable the case remembers to me,
in date this music I forms it given of the smile.
And I knew, if Imeant that the probability had could stimulate this person,
excess topossibly dance
and they___d during a little while where it is lucky.

But February the source to brivido
the each paper of I___d him leftit.
The messages become in the value of the initial end;
Couldn___t ofthe switch of the new emergency the phase.

Can___t remembers I, of ifgridassi,
when I age informed into the relative widowed the fiancèe,
but to something I deeply to the interior he giornalmente touched,
when music dies.

CHORUS: Therefore good bye, American of ms the black andwhite man.
With the mines chevy controlled with the ascent,
but theascent was dried above
and good the old boys of the man had drunk thewhiskey and the mountain ranges he of the song,
"this are the daywho is
"this the day of the these data of die."

Were youwritten the book of the love
and you model here in an ignited God,
ifthe visualizations of the bible you therefore?
You create the coil ofthe rock ' n',
the example of music, protect your Innersterblichs
andcan teach to me, because one you delay the danced applicable pain?

Spendthrift knows this you___re in the love with him,
since then ofwhich I they I SAW, the end to dance in the space of gymnastic to
bothgave to an effect ulteriorly its ice-slides.
Man, excavating thisrate/rhythm and blue.

A man of the new person of ___ of broncin
withrosafarbenen the eye and a small car had been located,
but it knewthat I came from the probability
the day, when music dies I.

CHORUS: I beganto sing...

Becoming fullfilled by 10 years of we___ve that in iscleaned our above of the one
and rubber of piuma of the rubberdevelops great on a rock of the source,
but that___s, not as it were.
When those had sung the bird of the diversion for the king and thequeen,
in a cover had made the examinación in the older loan of thatof James
and the voice, that came from you and me,

the ampere hour andduring the king to the surface that to have observed more loss,
thebird of the relative of the stole of the diversion the piece advancedthorny.
The public of the cut was raised;
There is declaration of theno judgment restoration nonupdated.
And during the Lennon a book ofread, exercised Marx
in octeto four of the bit in the park
and sang tothe damaged burial of music with bejammern
in the density the day.

CHORUS: Wesang...

More when skelter of that Helter in the valve of the butterflyof the summer.
The birds had flied the function excluded with aradioactive protection of the atomic fall are,
of eight miles of faceand fastly of falls outposts.
Examinación de Fêz to the scent of I hein the gram of the program.
The players had controlled touchlines in amold iron the end to see if he had a step inside next,
with the birdof the diversion for this.

He ventilates the end to become fullfilledwas force of motivatings of the substance of the odorosa of thepart-part-storm of thunders,
when the sergeants they to play an airandante.
Very they magnify to us, end to dance,
the OH -, only wenever who it did not take with the probability!
Since then that theplayers had tried to make the examinación of the zone;
The stickytape rejected andante the end to pay.
Remembered of, the one thatestêve
of the visualized day, when music is dead?

CHORUS: We began to sing...

The ampere hour and was we all in a station of the work,
productiongives destroyed in the station of the work without the hour,
orderedin the beginning immovable in the part of the left.
Thereforeadvanced: Fast cat or, Cat or digiunano!
The screw of the lightning ofCat was firm in a proprietor of the candle,
since then of which thatthe fire is the friend only of devil___s.

The ampere hour andsweeps-megabus that it has observed in the phase,
that one that wasrepaired my hands in the fists of the state of hardeness.
Any angelwas not used, that one in hell, could leave appropriate, theenchantment of Satan___s.
The flame of and had raised of, that oneduring which takes place to the night,
to Opferrite to illuminate theignited interior highly,
the laughter that considered, this Satan, ofwhich with pleasing,
that, the day, when music is inoperative man,

CHORUS: sang to him...

I came to the contact of a girl, this one sang the blueone
and requested he who the messages of a certain lucky way,
but havethe straight smile and gave distant return separated.
The payment hadcome in advance to the low point to the crowned memory,
where I___dhas the music of the felt of the years,
but the man who the game ofwouldn___t of music said here.

And in the ways: the children havescreaied,
that in griterío outside and in the one of the love thathas dreammed poèts.
But a word was not speech;
All the edge of thechurch was interrupted.
And the three men admire to majority: Thefather, the chain and santo more when backupcomputer,
had takenthrough him series to it of last for the coast
the day, when musicdies.

CHORUS (x2): And he had sung...


TODAY'S BOOK: "Lord Hornblower", by C.S. Forester ((c) 1946)

Labels: song

Haven't done something like this in quite a while. Today's random song is "Comfort Eagle" by the band CAKE, which not only has excessively random lyrics delivered in a cadenced monotone similar to that of "Particle Man", but also has a very random title: it doesn't mean anything, it is lifted from a line that doesn't mean anything, and it is mentioned only once in the entire song... Lovely!

"We are building a religion/We are building it bigger/We are widening the corridors/And adding more lanes
We are building a religion/A limited edition/We are now accepting callers/For these pendant key chains
To resist it is useless/It is useless to resist it/His cigarette is burning/But he never seems to ash
He is grooming his poodle/He is living comfort eagle/You can meet at his location/But you better come with cash
Now his hat is on backwards/He can show you his tattoos/He is in the music business/He is calling you 'DUDE!'
Now today is tomorrow/And tomorrow today/And yesterday is weaving in and out
And the fluffy white lines/That the airplane leaves behind/Are drifting right in front/Of the waning of the moon
He is handling the money/He's serving the food/He knows about your party/He is calling you 'DUDE!'
Now do you believe/In the one big sign/The doublewide shine/On the bootheels of your prime
Doesn't matter if you're skinny/Doesn't matter if you're fat/You can dress up like a sultan/In your onion head hat
We are building a religion/We are making a brand/We're the only ones to turn to/When your castles turn to sand
Take a bite of this apple/Mr. Corporate Events/Take a walk through the jungle/Of cardboard shanties and tents
Some people drink Pepsi/Some people drink Coke/The wacky morning DJ/Says democracy's a joke
He says, now do you believe/In the one big song/He's now accepting callers/Who would like to sing along
She says, do you believe/In the one true edge/By fastening your safety belts/And stepping towards the ledge
He is handling the money/He is serving the food/He is now accepting callers/He is calling me 'DUDE!'
Now do you believe/In the one big sign/The doublewide shine/On the bootheels of your prime
There's no need to ask directions/If you ever lose your mind/We're behind you/We're behind you/And let us please remind you/We can send a car to find you/If you ever lose your way
We are building a religion/We are building it bigger/We are building a religion/A limited edition/We are now accepting callers.../For these beautiful.../Pendant key chains"

TODAY'S BOOK: "The Crisis", by Winston Churchill ((c) 1962)

TODAY'S WEBSITE: uncyclopedia.org "Everything you know is wrong!" sang Weird Al Yankovic, and that's just what you'll be like if you rely on this by confusing it for the site it parodies, Wikipedia. Uncyclopedia is extraordinarily irreverent and tremendous good fun. One could literally spend hours mining its marvelously, gloriously insanely articles, newsflashes and factoids.

Labels: song

It's still not the 4th of July, but I'll teach you all the words to the national anthem anyway. Ready? Here goes:

כל עוד בלבב פנימה

נפש יהודי הומיה;

ולפאתי מזרח קדימה

עין לציון צופיה,

Labels: a day of independence (for all munchkins and their descendants), song, translation

Naturally, no song can compete with the sheer randomness of "The Llama Song" (featured earlier in this blog under a post of the same name), but some come pretty close. A shining example is Weird Al Yankovic's "Everything You Know is Wrong" (Hysterically well-made screenshot AMV at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGC09B810Yk), a veritable exercise in free-association lyrics. Just ICYDK, Weird Al's "Your Horoscope For Today" has also been featured here, which both showcases his tendency toward randomness and helps explain why he is one of my favorite singers. But I digress:

"I was driving on the freeway in the fast lane/With a rabid wolverine in my underwear/When suddenly a guy behind me in the back seat/Popped right up and cupped his hands across my eyes
I guessed, 'Is it Uncle Frank or Cousin Louie?/'Is it Bob or Joe or Walter?/'Could it be Bill or Jim or Ed or Bernie or Steve?'/I probably would have kept on guessing/But about that time we crashed into the truck
And as I'm laying bleeding there on the asphalt/Finally I recognize the face of my hibachi dealer/Who takes off his prosthetic lips and tells me

Everything you know is wrong/Black is white, up is down and short is long/And everything you thought was just so important doesn't matter/Everything you know is wrong/Just forget the words and sing along/All you need to understand is/Everything you know is wrong

I was walkin' to the kitchen for some Golden Grahams/When I accidentally stepped into an alternate dimension/And soon I was abducted by some aliens from space/Who kinda looked like Jamie Farr
They sucked out my internal organs/And they took some Polaroids/And said I was a darn good sport/And as a way of saying thank you/They offered to transport me back to any point in history that I would care to go
And so I had them send me back to last Thursday night so I could pay my phone bill on time/Just then the floating disembodied head of Colonel Sanders started yelling

Everything you know is wrong/Black is white, up is down and short is long/And everything you thought was just so important doesn't matter/Everything you know is wrong/Just forget the words and sing along/All you need to understand is/Everything you know is wrong

I was just about to mail a letter to my evil twin/When I got a nasty paper cut/And, well, to make a long story short/It got infected and I died
So now I'm up in heaven with St. Peter by the Pearly Gates/And it's obvious he doesn't like the Nehru jacket that I'm wearing/He tells me that they've got a dress code
Well, he lets me into heaven anyway/But I get the room next to the noisy ice machine for all eternity/And every day he runs by screaming

Everything you know is wrong/Black is white, up is down and short is long/And everything you used to think was so important/Doesn't really matter anymore/Because the simple fact remains that/Everything you know is wrong/Just forget the words and sing along/All you need to understand is/Everything you know is wrong/Everything you know is wrong"


TODAY'S BOOK: "Lost Horizon", by James Hilton ((c) 1933)

Labels: song

Sometimes I feel that only a band with such a wonderfully random name as They Might Be Giants could churn out a song so wonderfully random as "Particle Man" (Teen Titans AMV at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vd8tfDURZps, because you expect it, and Tiny Toons version at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnUXZlatV6Y, because you didn't expect it and anyway the clip was actually specifically tailored to the song and aired thusly on TV):

"Particle Man, Particle Man/Doing the things a particle can/What's he like? It's not important/Particle Man
Is he a dot, or is he a speck?/When he's underwater does he get wet?/Or does the water get him instead?/Nobody knows, Particle Man
Triangle Man, Triangle Man/Triangle Man hates particle man/They have a fight, Triangle wins/Triangle Man
Universe Man, Universe Man/Size of the entire universe Man/Usually kind to smaller man/Universe Man
He's got a watch with a minute hand,/Millenium hand and an eon hand/When they meet it's a happy land/Powerful man, Universe Man
Person Man, Person Man/Hit on the head with a frying pan/Lives his life in a garbage can/Person Man
Is he depressed or is he a mess?/Does he feel totally worthless?/Who came up with Person Man?/Degraded man, Person Man
Triangle Man, Triangle Man/Triangle Man hates Person Man/They have a fight, Triangle wins/Triangle Man"


TODAY'S BOOK: "The Pushcart Wat", by Jean Merrill ((c) 1964)

TODAY'S MOVIE: "The Prince of Egypt", from DreamWorks (1998)

WWWW2?: Thomas Edison.

TODAY'S WEBSITE: http://www.nytimes.com/ The New York Times is one of the world's oldest, most prestigious, and widely read newspapers. Now, by accessing this site, you can catch up on all the news and all the action without even waiting each morning for the print version! Chock-a-block full of articles (some of which, unfortunately, you must pay to read) that break in real time.

Labels: song

Forget everything I've said before. "The Llama Song" is the most random thing I've heard in my life--funny, original, and catchy. But especially RANDOM!

"Here's a llama/There's a llama/And another little llama/Fuzzy llama/Funny llama/Llama llama/Duck
Llama llama/Cheesecake/Llama/Tablet/Brick/Potato/Llama/Llama llama/Mushroom/Llama/Llama llama/Duck
I was once a treehouse/I lived in a cake/But I never saw the way/The orange slayed the rake/I was only three years dead/But it told a tale/And now listen, little child/To the safety rail
Did you ever see a llama/Kiss a llama/On the llama/Llama's llama/Tastes of llama/Llama llama/Duck
Half a llama/Twice the llama/Not a llama/Farmer/Llama/Llama in a car/Alarm a llama/Llama/Duck
Is this how it's told now?/Is it all so old?/Is it made of lemon juice?/Doorknob/Ankle/Cold/Now my song is getting thin/I've run out of luck/Time for me to retire now/And become a duck"


TODAY'S BOOK: "Jesse James: Last Rebel of the Civil War", by T.J. Stiles ((c) 2002)

TODAY'S MOVIE: "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory", from Warner Bros. (1971)

WWWW2?: Henry Ford.

TODAY'S WEBSITE: www.jkrowling.com This is run by one of the most beloved and successful children's authors on the planet--Joanne Kathleen "J.K." Rowling of "Harry Potter" fame. Occasionally updated with diary entries, the site also contains links to other fansites, a Wizard of the Month section, and debunked rumors, among other stuff.

Labels: song

Before I begin my post, let me retract an earlier comment I made about the trout puddle in front of my school; yesterday, some unnamed idiot pulled the faucet out of the wall in a school bathroom. Result: 1 flooded floor and 100 surprised kids.
OK, now for the gist meat: more random song funness, this time Weird Al's "That's Your Horoscope For Today" (AMV: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6za2mXmwXc --can you see a pattern in my choices of illustrative AMVs? Laugh Out Loud and XD, whatever the heck that means), whose predictions are deliciously random.

"AQUARIUS: There's travel in your future when your tongue freezes to the back of a speeding bus/Fill that void in your pathetic life by playing Whack-A-Mole seventeen hours a day
PISCES: Try to avoid any Virgos or Leos with the Ebola virus/You are the true Lord of the Dance, no matter what those idiots at work say
ARIES:The look on your face will be priceless when you find that forty-pound watermelon in your colon/Trade toothbrushes with an albino dwarf, then give a hickey to Meryl Streep
TAURUS: You will never find true happiness--what you gonna do, cry about it?/The stars predict tomorrow you'll wake up, do a bunch of stuff, and then go back to sleep

That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)/That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)/That's your horoscope for today

GEMINI: Your birthday party will be ruined once again by your explosive flatulence/Your love life will run into trouble when your fiancee hurls a javelin through your chest
CANCER: The position of Jupiter says you should spend the rest of the week face down in the mud/Try not to shove a roll of duct tape up your nose while taking your driver's test
LEO: Now is not a good time to photocopy your butt and staple it to your boss's face, oh no/Eat a bucket of tuna-flavored pudding, then wash it down with a gallon of Strawberry Quik
VIRGO: All Virgos are extremely friendly and intelligent--except for you/Expect a big surprise today when you wind up with your head impaled on a stick

That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)/That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)/That's your horoscope for today

Now you may find it inconceivable or at the very least a bit unlikely that the relative position of the planets and the stars could have a special deep significance or meaning that exclusively applies to only you, but let me give you my assurance that these forcasts and predictions are all based on solid, scientific, documented evidence, so you would have to be some kind of moron not to reaize that every single one of the is absolutely true... Where was I?
LIBRA: A big promotion is just around the corner--for someone much more talented that you/Laughter is the very best medicine, remember that when your appendix bursts next week
SCORPIO: Get ready for an unexpected trip when you fall screaming from an open window/Work a little harder on improving your low self-esteem, you stupid freakSAGITTARIUS: All your friends are laughing behind your back (kill them!)/Take down all those naked pictures of Ernest Borgnine you've got hanging in your den
CAPRICORN: The stars say that you're an exciting and wonderful person, but you know they're lying/If I were you, I'd lock my doors and windows and never never never never never leave my house again

That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)/That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)/That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today (that's your horoscope for today)That's your horoscope for today
That's your horoscope for today (yay yay yay yay yay)That's your horoscope for today"


TODAY'S BOOK: "Karen", by Marie Killilea ((c) 1952)

TODAY'S MOVIE: "Robin Hood", from Disney (1973)

WWWW2?: Don Corleone.

TODAY'S WEBSITE: www.dccomics.com While not as user-friendly as I'd like it to be, DC Comics' official site has covers and summaries of all series within a five-issue span, information on buying items, and a running update on their "52" series (the lost year after their major "Infinite Crisis" storyline), which is rather helpful.

Labels: song

Hooray! To randomly celebrate my 6th post, I've decided to display the most random song I have ever heard, courtesy of Lemon Demon (an accompanying high-quality fan-made AMV may be found at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0G9NzYpA3w):

"Old Godzilla was hopping around/Tokyo City like a big playground
When suddenly Batman burst from the shade/And hit Godzilla with a Batgrenade
Godzilla got pissed and began to attack/But didn't expect to be blocked by Shaq
Who proceeded to open up a can of Shaq Fu/When Aaron Carter came out of the blue
And he started beating up Shaquille O'Neal/Then they both got flattened by the Batmobile
But before it could make it back to the Batcave/Abraham Lincoln popped out of his grave
And took an AK-47 out from under his hat/And blew Batman away with a rat-a-tat-tat
But he ran out of bullets and he ran away/because Optimus Prime came to save the day

This is the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny
Good guys, bad guys, and explosions as far as the eye can see
And only one will survive, I wonder who it will be
This is the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny

Godzilla took a bite out of Optimus Prime/Like Scruff McGruff took a bite out of crime
And then Shaq came back covered in a tire track/But Jackie Chan jumped out and landed on his back
And Batman was injured, and trying to get steady/When Abraham Lincoln came back with a machete
But suddenly something caught his leg and he tripped/Indiana Jones took him out with his whip
Then he saw Godzilla sneaking up from behind/and he reached for his gun which he just couldn't find
'Cause Batman stole it and he shot and he missed/And Jackie Chan deflected it with his fist
Then he jumped in the air and did a somersault/While Abraham Lincoln tried to pole vault
Onto Optimus Prime, but they collided in the air/Then they both got hit by a Care Bear Stare

This is the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny
Good guys, bad guys, and explosions as far as the eye can see
And only one will survive, I wonder who it will be
This is the Ultimate Showdown...

Angels sang out in immaculate chorus/Down from the heavens descended Chuck Norris
Who delivered a kick which could shatter bones/Into the crotch of Indiana Jones
Who fell over on the ground, writhing in pain/As Batman changed back into Bruce Wayne
But Chuck saw through his clever disguise/And he crushed Batman's head in between his thighs
Then Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White/And "Monty Python and the Holy Grail"'s Black Knight
And Benito Mussolini and The Blue Meanie/And Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie
Robocop, the Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader/Lo Pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger
Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan/Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan
All came out of no where lightning fast/And they kicked Chuck Norris in his cowboy ass
It was the bloodiest battle the world ever saw/With civilians looking on total awe
And the fight raged on for a century/many lives were claimed, but eventually
The champion stood, the rest saw their better:/Mr. Rogers in a bloodstained sweater

This is the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny
Good guys, bad guys, and explosions as far as the eye can see
And only one will survive, I wonder who it will be
This is the Ultimate Showdown...
This is the Ultimate Showdown...
This is the Ultimate Showdown...
Of Ultimate Destiny"


TODAY'S BOOK: "Travels With Alice", by Calvin Trillin ((c) 1989)

TODAY'S MOVIE: "Finding Nemo", from Disney/Pixar (2003)

WWWW2?: Sherlock Holmes.

TODAY'S WEBSITE: www.dumbledoreisnotdead.com Despite J.K. Rowling's recent public confirmation that Albus Dumbledore is indeed dead, this plucky site keeps chugging along trying to convince everybody that the late Hogwarts headmaster is not yet late. Runs some very convincing articles accompanied by nice "portraits" of Harry Potter characters, plus it links to breaking HP-related news.

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